Wrox United seemed to be cursed, with a string of mishaps that both embarrass and
amuse the fans and club. It seems that no matter how good their intentions something
always seems to go wrong. The most famous of these mishaps are listed below:
- Foreign players are invariably from Slavic cities that have no vowels in their name.
- Team's hopes are always pinned on new strategies developed by computer analysis of opposing
teams. Invariably a common programming mistake is blamed for the loss.
- Once the US State Department scheduled the Wrox United ‘football' team to play an exhibition
match against the Green Bay Packers (American football team).
- Muchanticipated match with London turned out to be with London, Ontario
(and the Rotary Club team at that). Same mishap comes up during the book with
Lancaster (Pennsylvania), Manchester (New Hampshire) and Aberdeen(Maryland).
- Players remain optimistic, generally attributing losses to the normal but unavoidable conflux
of low biorhythms on the side. It is just a matter of time and patience until all of
the players are at simultaneous peaks.
- Team saves money by holding winter training in a Scandinavian country where an outdoor field
can be rented cheap.
- One player has scheduling problems as he flies back and forth to a coaching job for the national
team of a small Pacific island state. No one seems to want to hear his constant rambling
about a World Cup berth for Vanuatu.
- Home field called 'Wrocky Hall' in deference to both the team's name and the dismal state
of pitch grooming.
- During crucial moments of play the coach frequently loses his contact lens.
- Star players continue to waffle between staying in football and switching back to their true
love of a spot on the UK's Olympic team for rhythmic luge, water polo, and various other
obscure sports.
Merchandise
This is perhaps the most famous of the mishaps of Wrox United. When Jim decided
to make the club more professional he decided that not only was a team strip required,
but also a range of merchandise for the fans. Sniffing a bargain, Jim negotiated
a great deal on a bulk buy from a supplier found underneath the railway arches in
darkest London. Unfortunately when the goods arrive "Wrox United" had been transposed into "Wrox
Untied". The disaster was averted by Jim seeing the opportunity to capitalize on
this by using the mishap to promote the misfortunes of the club. Since then the
goods have sold extremely well, and all now supplies deliberately have the incorrect
spelling.